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Tuesday, April 23, 2013

Want a great husband? Marry a great son.



Often I have spoken of what a wonderful man my husband is. But in as much as he is an amazing husband, he is an equally amazing son.

My 82 year old mother-in-law lives with us. For many newlyweds, this could present a challenge. But mi suegra is my second mother. I've known her almost as long as I have known my husband. In fact, we met before my husband took me on our second date.

Between us lies a language barrier, and at times, a cultural barrier, and at times, a generational barrier. But we're family. We cook together, watch tv together and on weekends, sometimes eat lunch together. She makes the world's best tortilla espaƱola and she has an amazing recipe for baked fish. She makes the greatest guiso and the tastiest caldo gallego.

Mi suegra left her home in Spain during the Spanish Civil War. This rural area of Spain wheres she lived had not even electricity before the 1950s. She emigrated with her family to South America, where she reconnected with a fellow Spaniard, the man who would become her husband of nearly fifty years. She raised three strong, healthy boys before emigrating yet again, this time, to the United States, where she established her home and cared for her family in the way she knew how.

Mi suegra is a hardworking woman. While she never took on the experiences of "modern" women, like driving or working outside the home, she ran her home with her husband like a captain in the Spanish Armada, but one overflowing with the values of hard work, love, laughter and faith.  

My husband's father (who, sadly, I never had the opportunity to meet) died unexpectedly nine years ago. As the oldest of three sons, and the only unmarried son, he moved his life into their home and cared for her as she grieved for her husband and carried on in the only life she knew, but this time, without him.

My husband became her primary caregiver, her interpreter, and her advocate. His other brothers, already married with children of their own, were less able to uproot their lives and step in at the level that was needed. They all remain close, but it was my husband who stepped up as his mother's lifeline, the one who would always put her needs first.

Seeing how he cares for his mother alerted me early on, that this man was a man of integrity and a man of love. And he has been, with me as well.



They say that a lot can be determined by the way a man treats his mother. I know for a fact that it's true.

My husband is a man of love, a man of honor, a man of integrity. He has the patience of a saint (with an elderly mother and peri-menopausal wife) and a wit that will keep you laughing for days. My husband has your back. Watching my husband care for mi suegra shows me the man that he is and how blessed I am that he is mine.

10 comments:

  1. What a great post! You are very blessed indeed. And I agree about a good husband being a good son.

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    1. Thank you for the feedback. :-) Please come back again.

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  2. True story! My husband treats his mother very well, always making sure she doesn't worry (which Spanish mothers do all too much!), helping her as best he can, and always eating seconds :)

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    1. Thank you for the feedback. It's precious to watch. And my husband is also an expert at seconds...it's his way of supporting our efforts, I think. Very sweet. Thanks again for visiting. Please come back soon. :-)

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  3. What a lovely story and you told it so well. Stopping from the Northeast Bloggers weekend hop.

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    1. PJ, thank you so much for stopping by. :-) I hope you come back again soon.

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  4. Aww so sweet! You have so much love to let your mother in law live with you guys!

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    1. Hi Rachel, thank you so much for stopping by! I am the lucky one. There's a lot of love floating around in our house. :-) Please come back soon.

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  5. Yes, yes, yes! My hubby was (and is) the most kind, loving and humble son. And that's the exact kind of husband he has been to me. He's an only child but always puts me first; just as he put his mother first during the years that came before me.

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  6. Such a touching post! I agree with you! I have been blessed that my late husband was amazing with his mom and took such good care of her until his passing. Even when he was so ill he kept his devotion to her. I did my best to continue that honor until her passing. I am now remarried and my husband's dad is 87 and again, he is devoted and loving. How lucky I am to have them in my life. I am so glad you have such a great husband and mother in law. Thanks for the kind visit tonight. Made my day!

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