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Wednesday, February 25, 2015

Feel Sexy, Be Sexy

Some days are easier than others. There are days when you feel hot. The jeans fit just right. The dress hugs in just the right places. You matched your bra and panties...and they're pretty. You feel great and you carry yourself with a subtle swagger in your step.

You're sexy and you know it.  

But then there are those days when you're rockin' the granny panties. You're bloated. Nothing fits right, and you look in the mirror and think, ugh! 

Sexy? Not so much. 

Few people feel sexy all the time, but feeling sexy and believing we're sexy closes the deal. If you think you're sexy, and you feel sexy, you are sexy. End of story. Own it. 

If you have ever seen the movie, Eat, Pray, Love, you must remember this scene...

Elizabeth is spot on. Why are we worried about how something looks, or whether it jiggles? Shouldn't we focus more on how something feels, how to mix up the routine, and how to bring new levels of pleasure to ourselves and our partner?

As a woman with more years of self doubt than I care to admit, I know that old habits die hard. But as a wife, if I cannot trust that this amazing man, who chose me as his life partner, his wife and lover, to love me and my imperfections, then I have a bigger problem than anything that could look funny or jiggle in the wrong way. 

Friends, trust that your partner loves you as you are. Don't let self doubt seep in like water and sink your sexy ship. 

Get yourself some pretty things, or nothing at all, and rock your inner sex goddess. 

Think sexy, be sexy. And have fun!

What do you think? Is sexiness mind over matter? 


  1. Oh, heavens, yes. At least when it comes to you and your husband. I am a Plain woman who has had six big babies. My poor belly and hips (and breasts, let's be honest) show it. And I'll never see forty again. I am sure I am "dumpy" in many eyes. My husband thinks I'm sexy, and he loves me, and that's all that matters. And I suspect he'll still think it in forty years. :P

  2. It's all about that confidence I ta;led about in my post yeasterday! Own it and hold your head high! You know your sexy, beautiful, amazing, so everyone else should too!

  3. I agree with you a 100% sistah! Amazing post. And I love that quote by Goi Nasu. I've written it down here so that I can keep my spirits high when I'm low. Thanks so much for sharing :)

  4. Oh yes, I think is something we all wrestle with. And winter seems to be an especially different time for feeling attractive! Going to the gym has helped lately, I'll admit. It also helps to remind myself that our partners probably have the same insecurities; they just don't say them outloud like we do ;)

  5. Good thoughts Kelly. Self acceptance and love goes a long way towards a good life!

  6. It's totally mind over matter! I loved this post!

  7. Hi, Kelly I love love your title. Awesome post and great point. I have had my share of not always feeling sexy, but thankful for a great man who reminds me everyday.

  8. Yes indeed it can be mind over matter but unfortunately society has forces us to see ourselves in a negative way if we are not perfect. I mean, who is? Yes, it's silly! My hubby loves me imperfections and all and, that's all that matters in the end.

  9. Hi Kelly, spicy. One good thing about menopause is you won't feel bloated anymore. Have a great day sexy lady.

  10. This is a cute post. It made me stop and remember that I need to some being so down on myself. I'm OK! Thanks for sharing.

  11. I absolutely adore this! so true. Even when I'm single I'll still do little things to make feel sexy: whether it's a mani or pedicure buying cute matching bra and underwear or shoes. And feeling sexy on the inside? Reading a lot and working. How true it is. Sexy is as sexy does. Confidence is key :)

  12. There's the sexualization of women type of sexy which is based on how others see you, and I think that's bad. But the good sexy that comes from being comfortable in your own skin and loving your body and yourself, that's a state of mind. For example, I feel sexy when I solve the mystery in a movie about halfway through and my husband smiles admiringly. Or when I make a snarky joke and my husband laughs out loud. I know that sounds so preachy, and I definitely have my moments where I can't stand what I see in the mirror, and it's been a long time since I "looked" sexy, but I like feeling sexy for my intellect and my sense of humor. So, definitely, mind over matter. :)